The Worldwide Weblog of Donald Pincher

by Joshua Gaskell

Tag: Blogosphere

Wednesday, 9th December 2015

Two teenage boys, overheard in a stationary carriage at Brockley:

BOY 1: My mum has started writing a gardening blog. But she says no one reads it.
BOY 2: Hmm. I wonder if she accidentally put it on the dark Web.

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Monday, 23rd February 2015

Break, v.

Pronunciation: /breɪk/
Etymology: < Old English brecan

1. To disable, render inoperative.
2. Contronymous to sense 1, in phr. to break the Internet: to not do that.

Friday, 16th January 2015

Search me, v.

Pronunciation: /sɜːtʃ miː/
Etymology: < search v. + me pron.

1. Used (chiefly imp. in response to a question) to imply that the speaker has no knowledge of some fact or no idea what course to take.
2. Used (invariably imp. given half a chance) to signal that the listener has to seek out the speaker’s blog with the aid of a search engine.

Thursday, 1st January 2015

Bank Holiday in England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales

These are my New Year’s resolutions:

1. I will help the blind across the road.
2. I will hang my trousers up.
3. I will put the sleeves back on my records.
4. I will not start smoking.
5. I will stop squeezing my spots, etc., etc.

An extract there from The Unsecret Blog of Adrian Mole, Aged 13¾.

Tuesday, 2nd December 2014

Live blog, n.

Pronunciation: /lʌɪv blɒɡ/
Etymology: < live adj. + blog n.

Commentary on an event while it is taking place, esp. in the form of frequent short updates.

Cf.,

Dead blog, n.

Pronunciation: /dɛd blɒɡ/
Etymology: < dead adj. + blog n.

History.

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